I'm getting weaker. I feel the pain already, ouch. Stupid pain. Never fails to let me off for a comfortable night.

I am so tired, I wished the world would just stop spinning for me... Haven't been sleeping much lately. I'm losing my concentration, and I think I would have pissed off someone whom I really really really do not want to piss off. Damn.

But anyways, nothing is exactly going my way. Like when you wanna sink your teeth into a really delicious hotdog, and someone has to grab it away from you. Sad. Worse, your boyfriend isn't helping. He's either laughing at your loss, or scolding you for it.

Damn.

What a girl needs now is loads and loads of love. I so wanna be pampered.
And my parents aren't giving me the type I want... =(
And Jun Yup, isn't exactly giving me that either.

Sometimes, I just gotta wipe the tears off my face by myself. But man, I sure wished there was someone who would help me with that.

I wished nobody would find me boring. That people will stop telling me, "I'm bored."
It's as if... I am the boring one, or... You only see me as entertainment in your boredom...

I wished there were those arms to keep me close. Every night, when I go to sleep, I feel nobody around. It's a scary feeling. It's a lonely spirit. My soul would be crying out, if anybody could actually hear it. I wished there would be someone around to see me sleep, those warm hands telling me that I'm not alone.

I wished someone would call me just to give me a smile. Someone who really really loves my name... Someone who would be happy when they see my face. And I would smile back at them too. I really would.

I wished someone would want me to stay. No, there won't be anymore 'goodbye's. Please stay. Please stay because it would hurt, every minute you're away from me...

I wished... I wished someone would give to me willingly. It's so difficult cheering myself on, telling myself that there was a reward after this. When really, I am just working so very hard just to get things back to normal...

I wished someone would pick me up the moment I fall. Someone to ask if I hurt anywhere, even if it's just a minor fall. I really wished it would happen. But whenever I fall, I have to stand up on my own, and tend to my wounds myself. Because nobody cared if I hurt.

Ever wondered how it would feel... If you had cared about someone when he had fallen, tended to his injuries no matter how small they are... And the exact same person just ignores you when you fall because of his actions... No, not even an apology. Let alone a care. Then, when you ask him for some help, you just get told off...

Why?

I really don't know.

I will just.. Keep wishing.

Or is that because I trust in him...

Who.

Who will reach out to me?