Huhuhu~

It's that time of the semester again... A year ago, it was all really enjoyable.
As a first year, taking Uni exams for the very first time. But at that time, honestly, I couldn't get my head in the game academically. So my CAP suffered a lot.

But also, reading week was a memorable one. And during this period, I think back to a year ago at times. Often I wished things could be the same as they were a year before.

Like, having the 31st around me. The numerous stayovers in the clubroom with the people. Studying till late in the clubroom. Watching Fringe with Leonard.
Stuff like that, yeah.

Except that things aren't the same now.
Even though I do accept that things change, I still wished I had another chance to relive the 31st life.

I wished we were all still together, being happy together, unlike now where everyone is mostly scattered around. People who never return to the clubroom anymore, people who changed faculties, person who left the school entirely.

And people... change. Some even more so than others.

At times I wonder if everything was my fault. And if I were to take the blames, if everything would be better?

Things.
Only if.

And trust.
After all these, I wonder if I should just stop trusting others. It's taken quite a bit of effort and time for me to open up to the way I am now. Yet trust gets betrayed again and again.
I used to say to myself once, determined, that I will always trust others because by doing so it gives them confidence to do their very best. It gives others someone who believes in them, and I felt that it would be natural for them to treat me as a friend they'd protect.

After all, I don't know if I can do the same again.

But I have come a long way. I did gain self-confidence, and that to me is already an achievement.